| DON’T SAY… | DO SAY… |
| your own child | your birth/biological child |
| your adopted child | your child |
| real/natural parent | birth/biological parent |
| child IS adopted | child WAS adopted |
| Illegitimate | born to unmarried parents |
| give up/put up/ surrender/release/ relinquish for adoption |
placed for adoption or had an adoption plan |
| foreign adoption | international adoptio |
| unwanted child | child placed for adoption |
| foreign child; | child from abroad |
| the birth mother kept her other child | the birth mother is parenting her other child |
| You (adopted child) are lucky to have such great parents | You (adoptive parents) are lucky to have such a great child |
| You (adopted child) are special because you were “chosen” | You (adoptive parents) are special because you were chosen to be [child]’s parents |
